Archive for the ‘Blog’ Category
I’m not Walter
Sick today. The power was out for awhile. I had a wind-up radio which seems to only charge the battery for a few minutes at a time, and I couldn't find any local news. It's very difficult to get real-time news in a small town. We have no TV station, so we rely on the newspaper. Sometimes I hear about local news first on the Seattle TV stations.Dreams:
I forgot to mention another dream from November where a doctor was showing me two videos where I apparently hit my head. The videos played over and over, and the doctor said that I remembered the first time, but need to remember the second. When I woke up I thought "When did I hit my head the second time?" and then, "but wait, I never hit my head a first time either." Outside of the doctor's office, I could see the border, which is a recurring theme in my dreams. In my mind,I think the border is the "other side" as in crossing over. What would that mean? It's a desert. There aren't any people there. In this dream, though, the arid hillsides were terraced, reminding me of vineyards. While dreaming, I think I can go there whenever I want, but am not sure about returning. I imagine dreams of crossing over are similar to "death" in Tarot. Some sort of change.
December Dreams:
My dreams last week were generally unhappy, but amusing. Last week, I wasn't even me. In the last dream I recall, a colleague shows me photos of a really large person. She says she could teach me to lose weight. I know that the person in the photos is not me, but do not make the jump to lucid. Later in the dream, I am speeding through a department store in one of those motorized carts. A large elderly man, who was too happy and likely drunk, stops me and says "I love you, Walter."
dreams october
Early October dreaming:Conf dream:
I dreamt the world was in chaos from an airborne pandemic ailment. The 8 people I banded with were people known only for a few days. We were in an outdoor commons area registering with some governmental org, and were so tired from wandering on foot. I had money and found lodging for a night where we could all sack out on the floor. I looked at them and thought, anyone of us may have been previously exposed. We are all equally a threat to each other. (It was like one of those zombie movies, although I don't think we would turn into anything.) I was also much younger, maybe 35. A fellow came up to me and gave me a strong hug and a kiss. He was familiar supposedly, and I thought...oh, I've always loved you. That became the overriding feeling and pandemic anxiety was just a nagging afterthought, although nothing had really changed.
November dreams:
There was some element of stalking that had come up in conversations, which brought up past concerns and 2 interesting dreams.
Very simple dream. The past in the form of my old stalker layed upon the floor, a shell of his former self. In fact he was like a parade balloon with all the air let out. I picked him up and wore him like a coat with his arms thrown over my shoulders and his head as a hood.
It reminded me of primitive man, who might wear an animal skin to take its power, strangely honoring something feared as well. Apparently most of us are a little Neanderthal. I felt protected by this borrowed belief.
The second dream brought the stalker closer, in the same town. I immediately moved to a cabin attached to a large hotel, and did not worry at all. The cabin was too obscure to be noticed by anyone.
I don't recall dreaming of the person as a person before. Neither dream created fear.
December Dreaming:
This past week my dreams are just silly. I dreamt there was a small waterfall behind the refrigerator which turned into something the size of Niagra falls. A person I know stopped by and quickly turned it off. There was a cute guy, dark-haired, skinny. I must have been young in the dream. I gave him a kiss and hug. He looked familiar, perhaps from some TV show. In the second part of the dream a lady was jumping cars with her own. There were a dozen on the street, and she was not liable for any damage. I knew she wouldn't make it. The people that owned the cars were at the movies, and they returned prior to her jump. I felt grateful as they drove away, because trouble had been averted.
Whenever I think of the dream, I hear Blondie's song "Rapture" about men from Mars eating cars.
That was it. I have trouble remembering dreams these days. If I pay attention, I'll remember.
dreams
I haven't been journaling dreams which is too bad, since there is an opportunity to compare dreams of 2010.So I'll start again, Maybe in another year, I'll have something to compare. Also I want to use them for art or writing. I've found a nice writing program to buy myself for Christmas that (from screenshots) organizes and layers pages in a way that makes sense to me, so it will be fun to try out.
My dreams have been interesting the past few months, although generally unpleasant. I'm oddly protected from them though through no effort.
Border Dreams:
Dream 1 : mid-September - I dreamt I was a sheriff in a ghosttown (Pearce) in SW Arizona. No one else was there at the time. The border was close (although in reality it would not be.) No one is visible on the other side. I was on horseback. In the distance, I see a creature moving toward me at incredible speed. I wonder if it is a raccoon. The animal launches itself at me from about 5 feet away, carried high into the air by its momentum, and sinks its teeth into my arm. It's a cat, which I would describe as either rabid or demonic. It looks at me malevolently, and I know that it takes pleasure in thinking that it has me and has injured me, but the bite does not make it through my sheriff's jacket. I know I am unharmed. My way out is to kick the horse into a gallop and knock it off my arm. The eyes of the creature holds such loathing for me and glee over its intended injury. The animal is much faster than me. If I get off the horse, the cat would rip me to shreds. I can't control the horse with the weight of the cat on my arm. Instead of handling the problem in the dream, I wake up in a fright.
Thoughts: My mind somehow engineered protection from the cat's bite, which is kinda cool if you ask me. Bad points: There was a way out in this dream, but I woke up instead.
The weirdest part was that I checked my arm when I woke up and there was an injury. It was a significant scabbed over gash on my arm, which took another 3 weeks to heal. I don't know why I didn't notice it previously.
History: Many years ago, I got lost in the desert and ran into (not literally) the sheriff and deputies on horseback at Pearce. Also my ex-father-in-law, now a few years deceased, was once attacked by a rabid cat. I've obviously attached to those events.
dreams
I haven't been journaling dreams which is too bad, since there is an opportunity to compare dreams of 2010.So I'll start again, Maybe in another year, I'll have something to compare. Also I want to use them for art or writing. I've found a nice writing program to buy myself for Christmas that (from screenshots) organizes and layers pages in a way that makes sense to me, so it will be fun to try out.
My dreams have been interesting the past few months, although generally unpleasant. I'm oddly protected from them though through no effort.
Border Dreams:
Dream 1 : mid-September - I dreamt I was a sheriff in a ghosttown (Pearce) in SW Arizona. No one else was there at the time. The border was close (although in reality it would not be.) No one is visible on the other side. I was on horseback. In the distance, I see a creature moving toward me at incredible speed. I wonder if it is a raccoon. The animal launches itself at me from about 5 feet away, carried high into the air by its momentum, and sinks its teeth into my arm. It's a cat, which I would describe as either rabid or demonic. It looks at me malevolently, and I know that it takes pleasure in thinking that it has me and has injured me, but the bite does not make it through my sheriff's jacket. I know I am unharmed. My way out is to kick the horse into a gallop and knock it off my arm. The eyes of the creature holds such loathing for me and glee over its intended injury. The animal is much faster than me. If I get off the horse, the cat would rip me to shreds. I can't control the horse with the weight of the cat on my arm. Instead of handling the problem in the dream, I wake up in a fright.
Thoughts: My mind somehow engineered protection from the cat's bite, which is kinda cool if you ask me. Bad points: There was a way out in this dream, but I woke up instead.
The weirdest part was that I checked my arm when I woke up and there was an injury. It was a significant scabbed over gash on my arm, which took another 3 weeks to heal. I don't know why I didn't notice it previously.
History: Many years ago, I got lost in the desert and ran into (not literally) the sheriff and deputies on horseback at Pearce. Also my ex-father-in-law, now a few years deceased, was once attacked by a rabid cat. I've obviously attached to those events.
FLATLAND
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“There!” said Warhol, again. And so, Pride and Power looked and commented in their usual way.
“They look like lines,” said Pride. “Yes, wavy lines,” said Power.
They’re black.
Yea, black lines.
They aren’t straight.
They’re MOSTLY straight, though.
Straight, then a curve down. Straight again, a curve up. One line like that. Then another.
They aren’t flat. They slant, I mean. A line, a space, another line… kind of angled up.
Those are angled up. These are angled down. They’re angled lines with bumps and dips. They cross each other!
You bet, they crisscross!
The Twins were enjoying themselves as they fed into each other. In this way, they were encouraged each by the other. And so, Pride did motivate. As such, Power did inspire. Yet sometimes, in that way, they’d be lured down an illogical path to a false conclusion. Notwithstanding, this time they were certainly right (”Definitely, right!” and “Surely right”)!
“No… no…” Warhol protested, standing up. “No!” he squeaked and stomped his feet. “You aren’t attending to it properly!” he quavered… using odd words and drawing out their syllables with emotion like he was wont to do. “They’re not LINES. They don’t CROSS. This isn’t a BUMP and that isn’t a DIP.” He ejaculated the words “lines”, “cross”, “bump” and “dip” as if, because of their seminal nature, they were repulsive to him. Then he tossed his brush down, shook his oval head, and pulled at his bleached hair with both lankish hands.
“Most affirmatively, they figure to be serpentine linearities,” said Pride stomping his feet and exaggerating his words for fun. “And, in actuality, the otherwise straightness of them transverse,” said Power waving his arms about and flopping his wrists. “Ha ha ha,” they both laughed in unison.
Thereupon, Power punched Pride in the shoulder good naturedly. Whereupon, Pride made a back-handed slap toward Power’s crotch.
As such, Power was moved to block Pride’s cuff. So, he slumped into a semi-crouch and used his cupped palms to protect his jewels. But, he squealed just a little bit as he did. And that had caused the more seemly patrons to glare, snort, and take on superior airs as if to say “Why aren’t those two more like that dainty one, there? We marvel at his bearing, his grace, and his charm. One can tell, he is emotional and sensitive. Just look! He’s so refined and so delicate… like a little flower.”
On seeing how the observers reacted, Warhol settled primly. In contrast, the boys froze… shocked. For, they could never understand it when people reacted that way. Then they straightened, too, in mock civility. And in this way, they finally piped down (though Power kept hands to front and at the ready).
Warhol had The Twin’s full attention now. So, neither he nor they noticed when Faith bent over, as if to pick something up, and flashed her beaver in their direction. Similarly, no one heard Hope giggle as the girls left the building.
