How do you date in 2008
dt on 17 Aug 2008
I've no idea.
I was out Friday night for a casino trip with my mother. After a short while, when it seemed that there was little chance of winning at anything, I sat at a Kino machine where I could lose ever more slowly.
Casinos draw a variety of people. Some are driven, obsessed with the possibility of a big break allowed by luck which may or may not be influenced through the use of charms or rituals. It's curious to me, but I don't discount it entirely. I wonder if bad luck can be psi-missing event. You simply don't believe.
So in the casino, a fellow comes over expressly to speak to me. He was not gambling, but sat down and at first interviewed me about who I was and why I was here. Initially, I thought he worked for the casino as some sort of spy for the marketing group, because the questions were pretty specific, about me, the town, the facilities, the other entertainment. He was cute, young, seemed nice.
Conversation is a game that I'm not used to playing, but was aware of the game whole time watching the moves in my head. Some of it is very deliberate whether spoken or not. The moves: Although he said nothing aggressive, he entered my space by leaning forward close to my face while speaking and constantly stepping on my foot. He chased a couple off who wanted to sit there, protecting the space. Responding moves: I tried to end the conversation at the beginning by telling him how old I was (1) by telling him I was here with my mother (2) and then by telling him that I take care of her in my home. All the while I thought he was attractive and would be happy to follow him around just to look at him.
We talked about spies and religion and local volcanoes. I told him that some of the ash from Mount St. Helens covered patios in North Dakota, and that I was working in Arizona at the time. He said he didn't remember because he was 4.
I wondered if I'd been set up by a person who I knew who is a real practical joker (and she knew I would be there.) Four hours later he decided to go to wherever he was staying to sleep. He asked me to call him the next day. I didn't, but I did think about it. It was nice that he'd been talking to me; it made me feel attractive. If I had more time, I'd take a chance and be a friend.
I don't know what aggressive is. It may not have seemed so aggressive had the little toe he kept pressing not been broken three weeks ago. Maybe that's how people express interest today. Yet one of my favorite lines that we were choosing between a few months ago to be indirect code sentence to let another know the conversation was inappropriate or too heated at work was "You are standing on my foot." They didn't end up selecting that sentence, but it is still my favorite.
I was out Friday night for a casino trip with my mother. After a short while, when it seemed that there was little chance of winning at anything, I sat at a Kino machine where I could lose ever more slowly.
Casinos draw a variety of people. Some are driven, obsessed with the possibility of a big break allowed by luck which may or may not be influenced through the use of charms or rituals. It's curious to me, but I don't discount it entirely. I wonder if bad luck can be psi-missing event. You simply don't believe.
So in the casino, a fellow comes over expressly to speak to me. He was not gambling, but sat down and at first interviewed me about who I was and why I was here. Initially, I thought he worked for the casino as some sort of spy for the marketing group, because the questions were pretty specific, about me, the town, the facilities, the other entertainment. He was cute, young, seemed nice.
Conversation is a game that I'm not used to playing, but was aware of the game whole time watching the moves in my head. Some of it is very deliberate whether spoken or not. The moves: Although he said nothing aggressive, he entered my space by leaning forward close to my face while speaking and constantly stepping on my foot. He chased a couple off who wanted to sit there, protecting the space. Responding moves: I tried to end the conversation at the beginning by telling him how old I was (1) by telling him I was here with my mother (2) and then by telling him that I take care of her in my home. All the while I thought he was attractive and would be happy to follow him around just to look at him.
We talked about spies and religion and local volcanoes. I told him that some of the ash from Mount St. Helens covered patios in North Dakota, and that I was working in Arizona at the time. He said he didn't remember because he was 4.
I wondered if I'd been set up by a person who I knew who is a real practical joker (and she knew I would be there.) Four hours later he decided to go to wherever he was staying to sleep. He asked me to call him the next day. I didn't, but I did think about it. It was nice that he'd been talking to me; it made me feel attractive. If I had more time, I'd take a chance and be a friend.
I don't know what aggressive is. It may not have seemed so aggressive had the little toe he kept pressing not been broken three weeks ago. Maybe that's how people express interest today. Yet one of my favorite lines that we were choosing between a few months ago to be indirect code sentence to let another know the conversation was inappropriate or too heated at work was "You are standing on my foot." They didn't end up selecting that sentence, but it is still my favorite.
A delightful story.
I think you wanted to call. Sounded that way, at least.
Could be a “player”, though.
But I think you know the “game” well enough.
Hey Scorp,
Whatcha been doin?
Hi Alice,
I’ve been pretty busy lately. Myra and I got married back in May. Went to Barcelona for the honeymoon. We moved into a bigger place. It’s my second move in a year. The place at the lake was becoming oppresive. It wasn’t a very well kept place. The people there seemed sad. I was starting to dread driving back and having to look at the littered yards, broken down cars, decaying old mobile homes. Now we live in the middle of Dallas in a nice area. Lots of activity. Nice places to go and see. I may go for a walk around White Rock Lake in a bit.
I started massage therapy school the day after returning form Spain. I was going part time in the mornings and working fulltime at night. It was becoming a major struggle. Part time in that program is 4 hours a day. It was from 8am till Noon. Then I would go to work at 2pm till 12:30am. I was exhausted. If for any reason I had to stay late, the next day was unbearable. Luckily though, they shut the school down after a month. I was bummed at the time but looking back it was for the best. I started looking around for another school and a way to work my finances and schedule around it. I decided to save my money for a few months, leave the sour cream plant, and go to school fulltime.
So now I go to class from 8:30am till 5pm. I get to spend more time with Myra and am working towards something I feel a lot better about than what I was doing before. The plant was becoming oppressive too. When I told them I was leaving, just about everyone came up to me at one point or another and told me how much they hated that place. They said I was lucky to be leaving. I started to ask them why they stayed. “Well it’s a good job…”, is usually what they would say. The way I see it it can’t be that good if you hate it. I was starting to feel like a zombie there. Just going through the motions during the week and spending the weekends trying to block it out of my mind. I was numb. I’m still trying to shake the hypnosis of that place and regain a sense of self.
I’m halfway through the program now. I’ll be finished January 6th. I’m in the internship and everyone I’ve worked on has been very happy. It’s so much more rewarding than running manufacturing machines. The work I do now is focused on taking away peoples aches and pains and helping them relax. There’s really no politics or abusive “bosses” to worry about. The profession itself is very flexible. I can work entirely on my own or work for a spa. Or both. The unstructured nature of it brings it’s own challanges but I’d rather deal with those than the others.
So I’m in a good place now. Much better than I was a couple years ago. I’m looking forward to the Holidays coming up. My favorite time of the year. I love the cool weather and Autumn colors. This year we’ll spend Thanksgiving here with my family and Christmas in Arkansas with Myra’s family. We’re going up there next weekend for a short visit.
Hope everything is going well for you
Wow. I wrote a (Similar?) bio recapping my life over the past 25 years to a friend. Therapeutic. And I woke this morning (Also?) thinking “Where are the smiling faces?”. Don’t mean to “steal your thunder”. Just checking in. Saying hi!